Have you ever seen a movie where the character is going insane/ losing his mind? The volume of all of the things around him goes up really loud, and it sounds like pure chaos. A bug chirping. Rain dripping. A car whizzing by. Its all SO loud, and he can’t filter it out. I can’t think of a specific movie where this happens, but I generally feel like it exists, and I’ve seen it. So let’s go with it.

With a brain injury this is how I have felt quite often. Everything, every movement, every noise, every person is banging on your door at once. Except that door is your brain. You can’t make it stop.

Ring ring. Knock knock. I often wish I had a shirt or huge sign that says “I have a brain injury, fuck off.”

The only peace is silence. No movement. Stillness in every sense, literally and figuratively.

Every noise, bird, screen change on the TV, person walking by. You can’t choose which to filter out. They are all demanding for equal attention. Where is my get out of jail free card?

Your only choice is to put a wall up. Dig yourself deeper into your private hole. Your bubble within a bubble. Seek protection from the world. You run to your room and hide under the the covers. No noise. No movement. Only stillness and the sound of your breathing. This is your safe place.